My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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