careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
