Where are you?
In a non slutty way
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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