I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
