who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
i out mim tonsoeep
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