It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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