i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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