I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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