cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
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