Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
