evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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