thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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