It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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