You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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