Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
