No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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