The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
