Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
vagina is talking i cant
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
