"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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