Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Will you blow on my dice?
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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