3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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