new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize