Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Randomize
