put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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