it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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