this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
