great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
just tell him i said nine months
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
