Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Randomize
