I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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