I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
