Small penises have feelings too.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
