we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
