i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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