if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
