the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
