Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
