so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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