Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Randomize