I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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