batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
