was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
