I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
