Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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