Quick, to the slutcave!
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Even my vagina gasped.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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