she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
