She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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