I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
My pussy is not your playground.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
