I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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