ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
