Plan B is the new Plan A
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
